Yardly Tales: Yuletide in the Trenches

The scene: a lovingly set holiday table. Present: the matriarch, mid-seventies. Deeply adored husband recently deceased, and now deeply missed. All four of her children present--a rare event. These include: eldest daughter, mid-fifties, funny, smart, bright, light, a people person; second daughter, also known as middle child, socially organized but also socially sensitive, talkative and cheerful yet unnecessarily nervous; the only son, also known as the black sheep, who has recently completed retelling the saga of his just-destroyed marriage, involving the fist-fight with the 18-year-old step-son, the calling of the cops, and the obligatory restraining order; youngest daughter, also known as the unplanned pregnancy or "the mistake"--this would be me--, who accidentally got a PhD in astrophysics, inadvertantly and inexplicably ostricizing herself from all but the recently deceased, deeply adored and now deeply missed father. Eldest daughter's fiance is present--she's newly engaged!! Horay! All are delighted. Middle-child's husband is present. He is a pillar of strength and stability and all are happy and calm in his presence! Horay! Middle-child's eldest, a daughter, is expected soon, with her fiance--she has just gotten engaged. Horay! Middle-child's son and girlfriend--both veterans of Operation Enduring Freedom, also known as the Iraq war--both made it out alive and are present at our table!! Horay! And she's writing a book which will come out soon, and is showing us some of her pictures for Iraq! Awesome! Youngest daughter's husband is present, who has chatted merrily to everyone and made the best gravy ever, and is well loved by all for being among other things the father of The Only Child at the Holiday Event, namely my beloved son. Who is, as of this Holiday 2004, six years old.

You will remember, that Holiday Season 2004 is only a few short weeks beyond the shocking and painful defeat of John Kerry and John Edwards by the Forces of Evil. So among all this, while dessert is being enjoyed, is my little son. Who begins with the following:

Son: Raise your hand if you vote for George Bush.

(In the interests of fairness, I will not reveal who raises their hands. But neither of his parents raised our hands. Instead, we held our breath. We had no idea where he was going with this.)

A few people put their hands up.

Son: Oh good. Maybe one of you can give me one good reason why anyone would vote for THAT IDIOT!?!?

(His parents are at once amazed and amused. This kid's got some serious comic timing thing going on!)

One diehard Republican reported that he/she just didn't vote cuz he/she was so disgusted with the party. The only other explanation I remember was:

Anonymous: Well, I think Bush is wrong about the war in Iraq. But I do agree with all his other policies.

Really?! Another intelligent right-winger, hoodwinked by the Republican Noise Machine.
Shocking. I invite all of you who feel similarly, as well as all of us who don't, to check out the new book by Victor Gold entitled, Envasion of the Party Snatchers: How the Holy Roller and Neocons Stole the GOP." This guy is a Barry Goldwater and Bush-the-Elder insider, so his words pack a particularly powerful punch.

Perhaps my next post will be about the destruction of my civil liberties so I can retain my status as a badged employee at NASA's GSFC. If you just can't wait til my next post, then simply Google "HSPD-12". Remember 1984? Now, you don't have to.